Testing the Virtuous

Song of the Moment: The Golden Floor by Snow Patrol

12mn. It was the day after the 2004 elections. I was driving to Ateneo to take the midnight shift for NAMFREL QC's Quick Count. Obviously, not a lot of people wanted to take that shift. It was inconvenient. You'd have to take extra cups of coffee. You'd have to be more vigilant because the early morning hours can play tricks on you and your ability to decipher the canvassing sheets. You'd have to go to school in the middle of the month of May, which to most is a travesty of the concept of vacation. But I decided to sign up for it anyway. Because I was feeling nationalistic. This is my chance to concretely contribute to social development and Philippine governance.

I was about to take a turn into Shaw Blvd. from Rodriguez Street in Mandaluyong City. I was steadily inching up the road just outside the Archbishop's Palace. And between feeling nationalistic at midnight and making the sign of the cross next to the revered Archbishop's chapel, I witnessed a crime. 

A man, armed with a pocket knife, was pulling a young woman's shoulder bag. The woman was screaming, "Magnanakaw!" But the man was swifter than the wind. He was running down the street; the woman was running after him. He hailed a jeepney, and in a few seconds, one jeep stopped in front of him.   

And I was right there, frozen in fear and indecision. I imagined myself positioning my vehicle just a few meters forward, enough to block the jeep from getting away. I imagined myself alighting my car, and calling attention to the man who stole the bag. I imagined myself looking straight into the jeep's glaring headlights long enough to give the woman just enough time to catch up with the man, identify him as a criminal and allow the jeep's passengers to act on the crime as well.

I imagined all these in a few crucial seconds....

...and then I watched the jeep speed off.    

I went on my not-so-merry way, disturbed beyond explanation. I am supposed to be a religious, nationalistic woman. I believed I was actively virtuous --- someone who knew how to persecute wrongdoing and acknowledge righteousness given any situation. But in this case, my righteousness remained a thought process.

To make matters worse, after driving a good 500meters down Shaw Boulevard, I saw a police station right by the side of the road. I hesitated a bit, wondered if I should report what I saw. But I still didn't stop.

At that point, tears started to streak my cheeks. I felt so guilty, so small, so unworthy. Here I was, claiming to be a person of virtue by volunteering for the cause of nationalism and making a gesture of religious significance --- but I failed the test. Because it was inconvenient and my safety could have been jeopardized, I chose to turn a blind eye. Where it involved clear and present danger, I wasn't so virtuous after all.

This afternoon, coming from my Zen Meditation class, I drove past that very same street. In a split second, I vividly remembered the events of that night. And although I can't find a direct link between this sudden purging and this afternoon's Zen session, I'm glad that I found the heart to write about it now. I want to forgive myself for not being a hero that night. I want to comfort my guilty old self and tell her that it's okay and that perhaps, next time, I can find a more suitable situation to be more decisive in exercising integrity. And if anything, I can make up for the lost opportunity in other ways. 

There are memories we choose to hold on to, even if doing so will just make our baggage heavier than it should be. There are memories that we tried so hard to conceal but will find itself surfacing at the most inopportune time. So, there are memories that just have to be taken as a necessary evil, in order for something to be learned. There are memories of mistakes made that become correct decisions after all over time. There are memories that give us a fresh perspective on who we actually are, a window into the self we never knew we were. And then there are memories that are just meant to be forgiven, not forgotten, in order for one to carry on living in an endless cycle of pitfalls and recoveries. 

Barack Obama is the 44th President of the United States of America.

Song of the Moment: The Star-Spangled Banner

And now, a brief tribute to the 44th President of the United States of America. 

 

As of 05-Nov-2008, 11:20PM DST (New York). 

306 Obama - 155 McCain. 

McCain speaks at Phoenix, Arizona and concedes. Barack Obama elected President. 

Manila, Queen of the Pacific 1938

Song of the Moment: Bayan Ko by Jose Llana

I wish I could see a Manila like this in my lifetime. Sigh sigh sigh.

I Power and Net Neutrality

Song of the Moment: Time to Pretend by MGMT

Athene the Best Paladin of the World started out in YouTube, after gaining massive hits on all his YouTube videoas, thanks to each video's display button showing raunchy photos of his gf, "My Bitch" and later known as Tania. Soon after, they launched a campaign to vacate seats in the Belgian Parliament, offering a blowjob from his gf for every vote marked as "NEE" --- they offered 40,000 blow jobs and received requests for 400,000 blow jobs. (If you're a guy and didn't know about this, click here to see the site and feel worse.) At the heart of it all, the campaign was really meant to decentralize power in last year's election for the Belgian Parliament and therefore, help curtail abuse of power.

Later on, the same group started a website documenting the last 90-days of a woman intending to commit suicide. This was, of course, not a real suicide but a campaign to raise awareness regarding suicide, to fight against the suicide culture ---- a disturbing culture that glorifies taking one's life.

I'm not really a fan of their methods, but I admire their passion. In both cases, this group utilized scandalous ways to get attention and eventually tapped a lot of internet users into reading about their causes --- which is more successful than most online advocacies out there.

Recently, they launched another campaign for net neutrality. Lifting from their website: "Net neutrality has been a much debated issue for several years now and there have been many lawsuits in cases where an Internet provider blocked access to a certain competitor's site or simply crippled download speeds on services that they felt were using up too much of their bandwidth." Basically, net neutrality ensures that we will have the freedom to access the websites we want and should be privileged to access. There are nuances to this issue, especially in restricting access to underaged minors; but their advocacy primarily targets prohibitive access to sites that require a commercial fee on top of ad revenues or sites that prohibit access simply because it's against certain cultures.

A recent development on their website claims that:

"Every significant Internet provider around the globe is currently in talks with access and content providers to transform the internet into a television-like medium: no more freedom, you pay for a small commercial package of sites you can visit and you'll have to pay for seperate subscriptions for every site that's not in the package. "

In other words, think cable TV for the internet.

Think limited sites against a certain fee you have to pay.

Internet will never be the same anymore.

For more information, read about the issue on this site: http://ipower.ning.com/netneutrality

Say NO to Net Neutrality! Spread the word!

MOTION: This house believes we should stop singing "Rehab" by Amy Winehouse.

Song of the Moment: Rehab by Amy Winehouse.

"They tried to make me go to rehab. I said no, no, no."

And in this debate, I would so eagerly volunteer to be the government prime minister, as long as I use the program cited on Glenn Beck's article entitled, "America Needs a 12-step Program." The great thing about this article is that we can apply it to our own country, and well, even our own personal progress and failure.

Anyway, I lifted the article from this link (jumps to CNN.com). Read on and take a moment to reflect about your own life.

Glenn Beck: America needs a 12-step program
Editor's note: "Glenn Beck" is on Headline News nightly at 7 and 9 ET.

NEW YORK (CNN) -- My name is Glenn Beck, and I am a recovering alcoholic.
It took me a lot of years and a lot of pain to be able to say those words and really believe them. Along the way, I was arrogant, greedy and self-destructive.

But the worst part was that I didn't see any of it.

Even at the lowest, darkest points of my life, I still thought of myself as that successful guy who everyone loved. I was the life of the party, the guy who could do no wrong -- the guy who everyone else only wished they could be. At least that's what I thought.

Now I know better. People weren't looking at me with envy; they were looking at me with disgust as they watched me throw away everything I had worked so hard for.

I think America can relate.

Through hard work and unwavering principles, America took itself from a far-fetched idea to the greatest, most compassionate, most free country the world has ever known. But as our success has grown, so has our arrogance.

We've compromised our values, sold out our principles and used our freedoms to justify giving more power to the government. In the first century of America's life, its government was afraid of its citizens. Now, it's the other way around.

Maybe America should consider starting on the same kind of 12-step program that's helped millions of other addicts who couldn't see that they were slowly killing themselves. Here's my version of it, condensed to six steps since I know that Americans are way too lazy to stick around for all 12.

Step One: Admit we are not powerless.
Take a look at our Constitution. Not just a transcript; find an actual picture of it. The first three words, "We the People," are at least four times larger than the others. Do you think that was an accident? Of course not. Our framers chose those words, and made them that size, because they knew they were the answer to any problem we would ever face.

Step Two: Believe that a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity.
I think this one pretty much speaks for itself.

Step Three: Decide to take our power back.
A recent polls says 81 percent of Americans now say that our country is on the wrong track. If you're one of those people, who do you blame? The Bush administration? Congress? The media?
Here's a crazy idea: How about blaming ourselves?

If you don't like the fact that your city has led the country in poverty and homelessness for the last 10 years, then ELECT SOMEONE NEW. Stop voting for the same people from the same party every year.

Our power hasn't gone away (see Step One), it's just been masked by politicians who are tearing us apart for their own gain. We need to reclaim that power, and then we need to use it.

Step Four: Make a complete and fearless moral inventory.
Alcoholics aren't exactly big fans of introspection and self-examination, but this is one of the most important steps to recovery.

What are America's faults? What are our assets? By taking stock of both, we can start to work on maximizing our strengths and eliminating our weaknesses. It sounds simple, but when's the last time you really thought about what America does right? That brings me to Step Five.

Step Five: Admit our wrongs, and our rights.
We're constantly reminded about America's faults and flaws, but what about our achievements?
If you want to teach our kids about Vietnam, that's fine, but you better also teach them about World War II. And if you want to talk about our wars, you better also talk about our welfare. America is one of the most charitable countries in the history of the world, yet our mistakes are always glorified far more than our generosity. That needs to be reversed.

Step Six: Be ready to remove our defects.
Just like an alcoholic, we simply cannot go from sleeping on the street to perfection overnight. This is a big ship, and it takes a long time to turn it around.

But we have to start somewhere, and the best place is with the defects that almost all of us agree on. For example, does anyone really believe that being addicted to Saudi Arabia's oil is a good idea? What about China owning billions of our debt? Speaking of debt, what about the fact that we've saddled our children with $53 trillion in future Social Security and Medicare obligations?

But before we can address any problems, we have to first admit we have them. Many of us are in denial about just how divided we've become. We think that it's just the election or the war that's tearing us apart, but the truth is, it's much larger than that. We're every bit as arrogant, greedy and self-destructive as I was when I hit bottom.

Fortunately, it's not hopeless. It never is. If a program can work on a rodeo clown like me, it can definitely work for a country as great as ours. But until we're able to stand up and say, "Hello, my name is America and I have a problem," we'll never even have a chance.

The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of the writer.

PS: I apologize to those people who really thought this entry was about Amy Winehouse. =)

Treason (by Ricky Carandang)

Song of the Moment: Megalomaniac by Incubus

My friends and I were talking about this article last night, and I was shocked as I haven't come across this (until I googled it this morning).

Apparently, this article has been circulating over email for a few days now (since posted by Ricky Carandang on his blog last 27-Feb) --- and I can completely understand why. It is disturbing. It is uncalled for. It is worth, not just a Manila power struggle, but a national outrage.

It is worth passing on, so that other people may know.

A lot of us have been fencesitters for quite a while now, insisting that all the "lawless gatherings" are merely detrimental to the great Philippine economic heyday. The peso is strong, investors are flooding in... and the youth and the religious on the streets are merely idealists who don't understand the immediate implications of another national uprising to a wounded country. But try reading what is written below and then look at me straight in the eye while saying, "She is the best person to be in power now, regardless of the circumstances."

Admit it. You can't just do that without looking away or looking down in shame.

Please pass this on. If you can't be part of the revolution on the streets then be more "one with the times" and use the Internet to express yourself. You've written about that party you went to, that concert you paid a premium price for, that family reunion you thought was boring, and your musings on how incredibly cumbersome or blissful your life is at the moment. There are clearly plenty of channels for people to express themselves with. Why don't you forward this over email? Write about it. Talk about it. Post photos, videos and what-not. Just do not be silent anymore.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Taken from Ricky Carandang Reporting (http://www.rickycarandang.com/?p=133)

TREASON

Allow me to expound a little on a story I did for The Correspondents on February 19th.

Seven countries claim ownership of the disputed Spratly Islands, just off of Palawan. China, Vietnam, Taiwan, Malsysia, Indonesia, Brunei, and the Philippines all claim to own part or all of the Spratlys. These overlapping claims have been a source of tension over the years since the Spratlys (we Filipinos call them the Kalayaan Islands) are believed to contain significant reserves of oil and natural gas. China was the most aggressive in pursuiung its claim. In 1999, the Philippines–under President Joseph Estrada– led an effort to prevent tensions by getting all the claimants to agree not to take actions to provoke other claimants.

But in 2003, the Philippines–now under Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo– rocked the boat that it previously steadied when it signed an agreement with China to jointly undertake seismic studies of the Spratlys and explore for oil and natural gas. Naturally, the other claimants were angry. After getting them to agree not to rock the boat, the Philippines sucker-punched them with the China deal. China’s traditional ally, Vietnam was so angry they it had to be let in to the deal to appease them.

Aside from angering our neighbors and potentially undermining regional stability, Arroyo’s action may also be illegal. Ombudsman Merceditas Gutierrez–who was then acting justice secretary–told former Senator Frank Drilon, who was then allied with the administration, that she believed that the deal violated the constitution, because while it was a deal between the state owned oil firms (PNOC of the Philippines and CNOOC of China) of the two countries, it implicitly gave China access to our oil reserves. Officers of the Foreign Affairs Department were also upset because the deal effectively strengthened China and Vietnam’s claim to the Spratlys.

What would compel Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo to sign a deal that potentially undermines regional stability, possibly grants China parity rights to oil reserves in the Spratlys that we claim to be ours, and likely violates our constitution?

How about $2 billion a year? After the Spratly deal was signed, the Chinese government committed $2 billion in official development assistance a year to the Philippines until 2010, when Arroyo is supposed to step down from office. My sources tell me that the Spratly deal was an explicit precondition to the loans.

A sizable amount to be sure, but for the Arroyo administration the China loans are particularly appealing. Not so much because the interest rates are so low and the repayment terms so lenient, but because Chinese loans do not have the cumbersome requirements that loans from the US, Japan, the EU, and big multilateral lenders have. Requirements for documentation, bidding, transparency and other details that make it very difficult for corrupt public officials to commit graft. In fact, in November of last year, those cumbersome requirements made it impossible for some government officials and private individuals with sticky fingers to avail themselves of the World Bank’s generosity.

It had gotten to the point where a corrupt government could no longer make a dishonest buck. That is until China’s generous offer came along. Given China’s laxity with certain conditions, its no wonder why almost every big ticket government project funded by Chinese ODA has been the subject of allegations of graft and corruption. There’s Northrail, Cyber Education, the Fuhua agricultural projects, Southrail, and of course the ZTE National Broadband project.

Until the ZTE National Broadband scandal, the Chinese government has had little official reaction to any of these allegations. Why should they? The $8 billion is a loan, not a grant. It enhances their influence in the region, strengthens their claim to the Spratlys, and expands their influence in the Philippines. The best part is, regardless of what Philippine officials do with the money–whether they put it to good use or steal it–it still has to be paid back. Its no wonder that anytime some midlevel Chinese official comes to the country, congressmen and administration officials literally trip over themselves to roll out the red carpet.

For corrupt Administration officials and their cronies, $8 billion represents unprecedented opportunities for graft on a scale that would shock ordinary Filipinos.

And at the end of the day, that $8 billion is going to be paid back. Not by the grafters in and out of government; not by the Chinese citizens; but by the millions of ordinary middle class Filipinos who go to work every day, pay their taxes, struggle and to keep their small and medium businesses afloat. The price will also be paid indirectly by tens of millions of poor Filipinos who will not have access to health care, quality education, and a functioning court system because those resources are not going where they should be going.

There’s a word for that. It’s called Treason.

EDIT: If you find the article above a bit too "opinion-based", try this other article written by Manuel L. Quezon III on the same topic but with more sources and a better historical grounding. http://www.quezon.ph/?p=1701

Or if you're too jaded and you feel the two articles could be written by journalists who were paid by the opposition (geez, what are you protecting?), read this article taken from the Far Eastern Economic Review. http://www.viet-studies.info/kinhte/Manila_South_China_Sea.htm

Looking Out from My Fishbowl

Song of the Moment: Beautiful Mistake by Better than Ezra

I've been quiet the past weeks when discussions would veer towards the Jun Lozada expose. The expose shocked me as much as most, and the sincerity in his cracking voice moved me to the bone. But I felt that the issue is still in its early stages, and there are a lot of questions yet to be answered, a lot of voices and perspectives to be heard.

I didn't agree with the Valentine demonstration that was staged in Makati last Friday, because I felt that the rally --- clamoring for a PGMA ouster with merits debatable among different sectors in society --- is not strategically powerful enough and came in too early from a much talked about "tipping point" of democratic purging.

However, as I watch the mass at La Salle Greenhills from the comfort of my room, I am left in an emotional torment. I can't quite put my finger on the internal struggle, but I am almost driven to tears while I'm watching right now. Could it be fear of political instability in the coming weeks that grips me right now? Could it be guilt for being seated so comfortably in the safety of my home? Could it be a poignant recollection of a student leader's past I have almost forgotten now that I'm in the workforce?

It was quite timely that I was able to watch ENDO last night. ENDO stands for End of Contract, a term that refers to the end of a contractual worker's temporary employment given the common practice among Philippine businesses of keeping workers for only 5-6 months to evade mandated labor provisions on workers' benefits. ENDO is an indie film that is primarily a love story but indirectly identified the vicious cycle of contractual workers in the Philippines. They know nothing of permanence, and are trained not to expect career growth. They have no other recourse than to abandon dreams of being lifted from poverty.

I am now in the business sector, so close to being a business owner. I have the opportunity to inherit a prosperous company; thus, I may never have the opportunity to experience the suffering of the Filipino in the grassroots. I am blessed, and I thank God for this reality every day. But every now and then, I remember who I was in college, as if it were a distant past. I was a student leader who so passionately pushed for social consciousness and action. Now that the reality of money-making and my personal survival is holding me in ball and chain, I feel my life is not as fulfilling as I want it to be. I have become my worst nightmare, someone who chooses to be so conveniently enclosed in a forcefield that separates me from the scorching poverty of the country. Last night, I felt guilty that I couldn't relate with the characters in ENDO. This morning, I was contemplating on whether or not to go to a mass that celebrates apostles of truth and accountability. Obviously, I stayed home and blogged and reflected.

You see, I found it easier to respond to a call to arms when I was still a student leader. I held a critical position that was expected to deal with bringing in the external to the sheltered corridors of Ateneo (or vice versa). But now that my priorities point toward bringing in more sales for our company, such that I had to take a business trip to VISMIN at the height of the senate hearings, I write this blog entry with reluctance over proclaiming my nationalism. Am I being hypocritical? Am I at fault somewhere?

I wonder if acting on patriotism is even a function of environment and capacity. For example, young professionals can argue that they cannot drop their work functions in order to participate in mass actions. They would have lost their jobs the next day, and that is tantamount to stupidity in a dog-eat-dog world. On the other hand, I also wonder if mass action is the singular way to act on patriotism. Is it the only representation of unity among Filipino citizens that we can display? Is clamoring for our cause in the streets the only way to be heard and the only roadmap towards policy tightening and implementation reforms?

I love my Philippines. I don't think I can choose any other country to commit to with such conviction. I will pay my taxes and treat my employees fairly. I will stay abreast with the social developments in our country. I will continue to provide for the less fortunate children whose education I have started supporting. And I can blog, like this, in an effort to urge other people from my cozy circles to question their lifestyles in the same manner I did... to ask if nationalism is still being pumped into your bloodstream. Perhaps, I can find a way to join the mass for truth and accountability at 6pm in the Church of the Gesu in Ateneo tomorrow night. But for now, I hope I got your attention.